5 Times Santana Drunkenly Confesses Something and 1 Time Sober
by freshbubblegum
Summary: 5 stories about Santana getting drunk and confessing something about herself that she would've never done so sober. Then 1 story where she finally tells Brittany something about herself sober.
1. Eremophobia

**Author's Note: This was a story I had on my livejournal account that I never put up here. It was a story I never got around to finishing and now I'm going to try to complete it! I don't own any of the characters from Glee. I also had to tweak the story from my LJ account because of new information I learnt about Santana's family (mom's name, that she has a brother, etc.) There might be still some mistakes around but hopefully they're not too bad! Thanks for reading**

They were both around thirteen when Brittany would first discover that Santana was a sad drunk. And perhaps sad was an underestimate to properly describe when Santana was intoxicated. There was so much sadness, so many hidden insecurities that Brittany would constantly wonder just how Santana ever managed to conceal it all in the first place. For one thing, it made her much more willing to deal with her best friend's often stand-offish, bitch-like behavior because as Brittany would come to understand, it was all a façade. Through her memories, she could remember five main occurrences where Santana revealed something that she probably would've never done sober. These little instances, these cracks in the mask, were significant in that it gave Brittany a closer look at the real girl behind it all. And while it made Santana appear like a fake bitch, causing many people to question why Brittany would ever befriend such a demon, there had been their non-inebriated moments where Santana would open her heart. Other times, however, a little liquid courage was needed for opening up.

* * *

If this were any other Friday of the month, Santana would usually spend the night at Brittany's house since the Lopez family was often busy dealing with their respective occupations. The second Friday of any month, however, was particularly special in that they were declared as Lopez Family Night. No matter what important events in their schedule each Lopez member had, they were to cancel anything that would interfere with their family dinner. Santana had always complained of these particular days, stating that she'd rather hang out with Brittany, but the blonde knew better. Brittany secretly knew that Santana was the one whom came up with family night and always looked forward to those nights where her family could come together and eat at the same time – something Santana always fantasized ideal families to do. Of course, Lopez family night didn't always go perfectly. Sometimes Santana's father would get a page from the Emergency Room and he would have to rush back. Other times, her mother had to stay a little longer at her law firm due to some big case and would come home late. The point was that they tried and Santana was always grateful for that. Thus, when Brittany waved goodbye to her friend that Friday, she certainly didn't expect the series of events that would come about.

* * *

After twenty minutes of waiting for her mother, Santana decided to finally call her mother. It wasn't particularly abnormal for Mrs. Lopez to be late for picking up her daughter, but it was strange that the woman had not sent some kind of notification for her delay.

"Hello, you've reached Maribel Lopez's phone," came a very practiced and professional voice that Santana immediately recognized to be her mother's, "Sorry I couldn't answer the phone right now, please leave your name and phone number and I'll get back to you as soon as possible."

"Hey mom, it's Santana…" Santana paused for a moment at the realization of what she just said. Of course her mother would know she was Santana. "Um… school ended a while ago, just wondering if you're going to be late or something. I… I can't wait for tonight."

She abruptly hung up. Her ears flushed from the embarrassment about her last statement; she had always tried to act nonchalant about their family nights. Unsure of when her mother would notice the missed call, she sat on the curb of the street and watched as other kids around her were being picked up by their respective parents. Some parents, she observed, would come out of the car just to hug their child before they got back into the car to drive away. It stirred a sense of envy within her. Too proud to show her mother the affection her child-like self wanted to, she followed suit the typical expectations of a rebellious teenager. After all, if she pretended she didn't care, then it wouldn't hurt as much when her mother disappointed her.

Fifteen minutes and two additional calls later, Santana decided to finally give up on waiting on her mother. It was rare for her to call her father, since he didn't like to be disturbed from work, but she figured this would be an important enough of an issue to bother her father.

"This is Dr. Derrick Lopez," the voice seemed neutral with a hint of sternness that only Santana could detect, "leave a message." Neither of her parents had answered their phones.

"I guess they're busy," Santana said solemnly to no one in particular. And as the words settled in her mind, she did her best to withstand the urge to cry from disappointment. Grabbing her backpack strap, she flung the Louis Vuitton backpack her father bought her last Christmas over her shoulder and made her way to the closest bus stop.

Unsurprisingly, this wasn't the first time her parents were "too busy" to pick her up. Since her first day at middle school, her parents had provided her the bus route and schedule that would guide her home in the case of something like this would happen. And after following the instructions for over ten times, Santana had easily memorized which buses to take and what times they would come.

It would take a grand total of forty minutes or so to go from William McKinley Middle School to the nearest bus stop to her house. Contrary to the reputation Santana liked to make about Lima Heights Adjacent, Santana actually lived in a gated community and had never been exposed to the rougher part of town. She liked to tell everyone she did though. It made her seem tough, made her seem like she was a person you wouldn't want to mess with, and that was exactly how Santana rose to the school as a certified bitch. She used her playful imagination to buildup her own image, so she wouldn't have to deal with the realities of a neglected childhood. In fact, Lima Heights Adjacent wasn't even that bad of a city save for a small selected area that was known for its gang and drug activity. The Lopez residence at the Lima Heights Adjacent Prestige Golden Gates was far from such an area though. As she rode the bus, she would constantly check her phone for any updates only to be further disappointed by the lack thereof.

"Hello, you've reached Maribe – " but Santana hung up before allowing her mother to speak words to greater agitate her. Maybe mom's preparing food and couldn't hear the phone. She thought about calling her home phone to see if anyone was even home, but she couldn't bear to set herself up for more disappointment. She was just going to have to wait until she opened the doors of her house and hope that her parents would be there. They'd welcome her home and she'd sit and the table smelling the savory odors from the kitchen.

Upon opening the front door, Santana was met with a high-pitched alarm which obnoxiously echoed throughout the manor. Quickly, she ran a couple feet where she entered the alarm code that would disable the blaring noise. She didn't understand how the alarm could be on though. Weren't her parents home? It was family night after all; they always made sure that at least one of them would be home to greet her.

"Hello? Mom?" she went into the kitchen to find the place completely empty. "Dad?" She circled the entire first floor shouting for her parents before concluding that her parents were indeed not present. It was then she remembered their community message board, the refrigerator. If there was ever something one of the family members wanted to tell the others, they would leave it on the refrigerator. It was their way of communicating without actually having to see each other. And surely enough right in the middle of the refrigerator door was a blue post-it.

Your brother got an interview to Harvard Medical School, we're going over right now to congratulate her! We're taking him to see the campus tomorrow! Sorry couldn't make family night! Left you some food from your favorite restaurant in the fridge.

Love Mom and Dad

Her eyes were wide and illustrated an incredible look of disbelief to them. Angrily, she ripped the blue paper square off the fridge and ripped it into as many tiny pieces as she could. No one really knew this, but Santana had a brother eight years older than her. An abnormally perfect man named Angel, whom Santana swore was created to constantly belittle her existence. Opening the fridge, she looked at the Indian cuisine bag sitting amongst various other take-out bags. Indian cuisine. She hated Indian food. That particular food was something her brother enjoyed, the very brother that was stealing family time from her.

She spent the next couple hours watching the television and eating some pasta her parents brought home three days ago. She didn't particularly enjoy sappy romantic movies, but found it intriguing that the adults always seemed to drown their sorrows with alcohol. As a thirteen year old who was often informed about the dangers of alcohol, she began to wonder why exactly it was so dangerous when it could erase your pain. She looked at the people on the television who would drink the stuff and be happy as though their problems were nonexistent. It was a good idea, even if the people always seemed to also barf the next day. Not like she hadn't barfed before, and maybe if she was lucky she'd barf on the living room carpet. That'd show her parents not to leave her alone.

The problem was Santana had never drunken alcohol before. So when she took a huge swig of her father's Johnny Walker Blue Label, she wasn't expecting to nearly want to spit out the expensive drink. However, she was determined to obliterate her feelings of loneliness, and so she sucked it up and downed as much of it as she could before she felt sick. The alcohol began to set in and she could feel her head starting to feel a bit fuzzy. She stumbled around giggling before she found the giant family portrait of her family hanging near the stairwell.

Fucking Angel. She hated him. Her parents always loved their beloved Angel more. The more she thought about the insufficient love she received from her parents, the more distorted her thoughts became. The happy feeling quickly left and in settled a horrible feeling of loneliness.

They LOVED Angel.

They loved him so much that they were moving away to be with Angel.

They loved him so much that they were moving away to be with Angel because they hated being with Santana.

They HATED Santana.

They'd be so much happier with their perfect Angel. Angel who was probably going to make Harvard Medical School. Angel who currently attends Yale University and happens to be the student body president and will probably graduate with top honors and valedictorian. Angel who happens to also be a concert pianist, a professional tennis player, an exceptional singer, a handsome model, a provincial activist leader, the most beloved guy at school – the perfect son.

They never cared about her. Otherwise they'd be here for family night.

"But where are you guys now?" she shouted angrily at the portrait. She ran to her phone and dialed the only person she knew would talk to her.

It was probably eight when Brittany heard her phone rang. Like Santana, she too had suggested a family night, so whenever Santana had her family night, she would have hers too. Her family was in the midst of a game of Monopoly when Britney Spears' newest song began playing from her pocket.

"Time out guys, I have a phone call."

"No time-outs in Monopoly, Brittany," her younger sister shouted as her sneaky hand immediately went to Brittany's side to steal a 500 dollar bill.

"Mom!" Brittany yelled before answering her phone. She pointed angrily at her younger sister before excusing herself to see why Santana was calling.

"San?" the blonde asked only to be met with sounds of sobbing. "San, is that you? Did you butt dial me again?"

"B-britts…" came a weepy response.

"San, I can't really hear you, is there someone crying near you?" Brittany wondered. Her best friend wasn't the usual person to be found in tears, and besides why would Santana be crying right now.

"They're gone, Britts," Santana slurred as she fell onto the couch, cradling the bottle of Johnny Walker in her arms. "They're never coming back."

"Who's gone San? Is it Mr. and Mrs. Fluffies, San ?" The Fluffies were Brittany's affectionate name for the two stray black kittens that had been wandering around Santana's neighborhood. A couple days ago, Santana called that she found the strays meowing in her backyard to which Brittany immediately told her to get some milk and to catch it so they could raise the kittens together.

"No, geez, Britt," Santana's words came out harsher than usual. "Why can't you understand that they're gone! GONE!"

"WHO Santana!" The blonde didn't know why her best friend was being more difficult than usual or why she sounded so strange on the phone, all she knew was that she was beginning to get worried.

"MY PARENTS!" Santana choked out before returning to her usual sobbing. "They just left. Today was family night and they just left me all alone."

"You're by yourself?" The words were automatic, and had Brittany known how much they would affect her friend she would have never said them.

"Fuck! Why did you have to remind me?" Santana shouted angrily, "Yes, of course I'm alone, I don't think they want me anymore. They never wanted me." The anger was quick to transform into sorrow.

"Why are you saying that? Your parents love –"

"IF THEY LOVED ME THEY'D BE HERE! BUT THEY'RE NOT!" the constant switching of moods was confusing for Brittany. She had never heard Santana sound so upset, not even when Santana's parents wouldn't let her have that thousand-hundred dollar Dior necklace. This was ten times worse.

"Do you want my mom to pick you up and you can sleep –"

"NO! I don't want to be around you and your perfect loving family. I don't want to watch your mom make you pancakes in the morning and give you morning kisses. I don't want to see your dad ruffle your hair in the morning saying how much he loves –"

"San, calm down!" Brittany shouted for the first time that night. There was obviously something wrong with Santana and there was no way that talking normally would get through the other girl. She didn't like to yell at Santana though and seldom did it.

"NO! I… I'm not going to because…. Because I don't have anyone and I really… I really just need you here. Can you come here? Please?" the desperation in Santana's voice caused a lurch in Brittany's heart. As the girl's best friend, all she wanted to do was go over and hug her and make everything better.

"I'm not sure if my parents will let me come over without your – " Ridiculous as it was, Brittany's parents still didn't trust two thirteen girls home alone together. Something about how Santana's living in a rich neighborhood make her area a constant target for robberies.

"Find… just find a way. I… I don't want… Please…." There was a sound of heaving and then a loud clang. Brittany wasn't sure what was happening, but whatever just happened she was now worried about her friend's safety. It was one thing for Santana to call her to rant about the events that were annoying her. It was another thing for her best friend to be weeping into the phone and telling her how her parents hated her. And now there was silence. The phone was still on and as many times as Brittany tried to call out to Santana, the other girl never came back to the phone. She had to go to her; the desire to be with Santana was stronger than anything she felt in her young life. The desire even beat that one time she wanted to adopt a duck. No, right now her best friend needed her and that's exactly was she was going to do.

"Mom, I need to go to Santana's." Brittany stated as she re-entered the dining room where her family was still playing Monopoly.

"This late?" Mrs. Pierce asked as she took a quick glance at the clock to confirm the time. Granted it was only eight o'clock, but as a worry wart of a mother she made sure that Brittany never be out later than eight-thirty. Besides, she knew how busy the Lopez family was and hated to think of ever imposing on them. It was already so kind of their daughter, Santana, to be such a great friend to her Brittany.

"We both just remembered we have a project," the thin blonde quickly fibbed. No parent could ever say no to homework.

"Oh… well, are her parents okay with it?" Mrs. Pierce wasn't completely convinced about the project because Brittany was a horrible liar. However, after briefly listening in on Brittany's conversation with whom she assumed to be Santana, she could feel in her gut that something was wrong.

"Yeah, they're just really tired from work right now so that's why we have to go to her house… like right now." By now she had completely halted the family game of Monopoly.

"Oh, honey, we wouldn't want to disturb Santana's parents. Why don't we just pick her up and you guys can work on it here?" Mr. Pierce suggested. Brittany too wished that she could bring Santana over and have her family shower her with the love she seemed so in lack of, but she couldn't ignore Santana's wishes.

"No, no they sleep like rocks. And we need to go now mom, like right now." The two adults looked at each other, unsure of what to do. Lindsey, Brittany's younger sister, completely bored by the situation just rocked her Monopoly piece back and forth.

"Mom, please, you know I'm border line on failing math, I need to go over to Santana's right now."

"You sure it's okay with her parents?" Mrs. Pierce asked one last time. If Brittany absolutely had to go to Santana's this would be the determining factor. If Brittany in any way hesitates, she would say no, but if she continued her strange stubborn behavior then whatever reason Brittany had to go must be serious.

"Mom, it's school stuff, when has school stuff never been a legitimate reason to go over to someone's house?"

"When you're supposed to playing Monopoly," Lindsey interjected finally unable to take the fact that it was her turn and no one was paying attention.

"All right, get your things sleepover gear packed. We're leaving in ten minutes," Ms. Pierce finally decided as Lindsey made some comment they'll never finish Monopoly.

"Lindsey, you can have the rest of my Monopoly money." Brittany said winking at her younger sister. She felt bad for ruining the night and was sure that that would be some way to make it up.

"SCORE!"

* * *

Standing in front of the large front doors, Brittany waved at a goodbye to her mother. Usually Brittany's mother would wait until she saw her daughter enter the Lopez household before she left, but the young blonde had been strangely adamant that she leave as soon as possible. Sometimes she wondered if the decisions she made in her life about trusting her children were good ones. What if something happened to Brittany? What if Santana never opened the door? A lot of these things flashed in her mind, but she told herself that Brittany was going to be in high school soon, then (hopefully) college, and may more things. She could spend the rest of her life holding her daughter's hand, or she could put her faith in her daughter and hope for the best. As much as the worry continued to eat at her mind, she told herself that this would be the beginning or letting go of Brittany's hand. So, she turned her car around when her daughter asked and never looked back. Be safe girls…

The door flew open and Brittany looked at Santana leaning tiredly against the door frame. Her head was cast downward, her long black hair concealing her face.

"Hey," Brittany whispered as she tilted her head to try to get a peek at the Santana's face. Before she could see anything though, a tanned hand pushed Brittany's head backwards and the blonde watched as a light brown waterfall made its way out of Santana's mouth and into the potted plant by the door. Santana quickly fell to her knees as her hands blindly grasped the edge of the large potted plant, trying to aim her mouth towards the dirt deep within the pot.

"San?" just as Santana's body collapsed to the floor, Brittany's arms caught the sides of the other girl's body making sure to stabilize her. As Santana continued to vomit into the pot, Brittany began to collect the loose black strands that danced dangerously with the pungent liquid.

"I'm sorry…" Santana mumbled, as she spat one final mouthful of vomit into the pot. Finally feeling like it would stop, she leaned back against the doorframe so that her friend wouldn't need to constantly support her weight. "I'm sorry… I…"

"It's okay," Brittany replied, her hands cupping Santana's face so she could see all the destruction. There was some vomit at the corner of Santana's lips and she could feel an unfamiliar dampness to the girl's face. The girl appeared so empty. "I'm here now."

"Britt… I'm so glad you're here. My family abandoned me… I… I didn't know who else." New tears began to form in Santana's eyes, but she wasn't the only one. Santana had become such a mess, and it was breaking Brittany's heart to see her usually so confident friend into such a state. They stayed like that for a while, just crying together.

"My parents hate me so much that they left me all alone and look at me. They won't even know… they don't even care." She slurred, her breath giving off the biting odor of vomit.

"Your parents don't hate you, San. They could never hate you," Brittany said, in spite of her uncertainty if her words were even true. Her experience at the Lopez household made it seem like her parents did love her but were just too busy to show it. Brittany was a firm believer that everyone in the family was loved though, no matter what.

"Did I ever tell you I have an older brother?" Santana asked as though completely disregarding their previous conversation.

"I don't remember?" Brittany wasn't exactly the best person when it came to remembering things. She was kind of like Dory, that blue fish from Finding Nemo. She'd get lost, forget so many things that she wasn't too surprised about how alone she was in school for so many years. No one wanted to be with someone as stupid and incompetent as Brittany. Then Santana came into her life; she was like that other fish. Oh, Marlin. Yes, that was his name. Santana befriended her and stayed with her longer than anyone else outside of her family ever did. And with Santana, she slowly remembered more and more things. Brittany wondered how that worked sometimes, that she could look at Santana and feel so safe and understood.

"You know that other man in the family portrait? I lied, he's not the gardener, he's my older brother."

"I thought it was weird that you'd let the gardener take a picture with you guys, but it did kind of make sense because he was never here." Brittany watched as a bitter smile appeared on Santana's face.

"He's eight years older than me. Haven't you ever wondered why my parents seemed so old? It's like my dad couldn't keep it in his pants and I was born. They didn't even plan for me to happen… I just did. Like a big mistake. I'm nothing like Angel." It was one of the few times Santana had ever spoken about her family and the first time Brittany ever heard that someone would be born out of mistake. When her little sister was born, it was one of the happiest things that ever happened in her life. She remembered how excited everyone had been, and now Santana mentioned her own birth as though it was an accident. It couldn't be though. Santana's existence could never be an accident because if anything she was born to be with Brittany.

"What's so great about Angel?" the blonde inquired, wiping away her friend's tears.

"What's great? It's like what's not great! My parents fucking love him. He's fucking perfect. You know how I go to William McKinley Middle School even though I live thirty minutes away? I couldn't make the private school here, the same private school Angel went with ease and graduated as valedictorian. He's a genius. He's going to make Harvard Med School and that's why my parents aren't here. They don't care 'bout the little tradition I put on. You know we've only had like three or four successful family nights? I usually lie to you about how great it was because I couldn't bear telling you that my dad left halfway during dinner because of an emergency or that mom left during movie time because of a big case. Their pathetic excuses to get out of hanging with me. But no, when Angel makes Harvard, they drop everything and fly to go congratulate him," though she didn't mean to, Santana was so worked up in her anger that she smacked away Brittany's hand. She felt vulnerable, but with the alcohol in her system it was becoming harder and harder to hide her true feelings. "They'd never do that for me. He's like the fucking perfect angel my parents wanted and I'm like Satan… making their life a living hell. I just try so hard, but no matter what I do I can never live up to him. Everything I do in comparison is just worthless. I'm nothing like him. I'm nothing to them."

"You're not nothing to me. You're something to me. Your parents might not have planned for you to exist," Brittany was still unsure on how babies could be accidentally brought into the life. She had always assumed that the stork would bring a baby when two people really loved each other too much. That way, with the new baby, they could give their love to the baby and the parents wouldn't get a heart attack from loving each other too much. "But I'm glad you were born. You're my best friend in the whole world and I think you're better than Angel by a million billion times!" She didn't even know if that was a real number or not, but it sounded pretty high.

"Thanks Britt, but you're not my parents. You're not –"

"I'm your friend, San. Your best friend. And I will always be here for you. If your parents are abandoning you, then I'll be your family. I'll take care of you." It was like Dory said. When she saw Marlin, he was like home. Brittany felt the same way, whenever she was with Santana, it was home.

"You'll… always be there for me?" Santana looked into those piercing blue eyes and could only see love and honesty. It was beautiful, and for the first time ever in her life, Santana felt truly loved. Through all the neglected love from her family and lack of friends, she had finally found someone who was going to be there for her.

"Of course, silly. If you think no one cares about you, come to me. If you think no one wants you, come to me. If you think no one loves you, come to me. I'll prove you wrong." And with that, the tall blonde engulfed Santana in a fierce hug, not at all worrying if vomit would stain her ducky pajamas. All that mattered was that Brittany needed to prove her words. Actions spoke louder than words, her mother used to always tell her.

"Britt… I…" She wasn't too sure if it was because Brittany's words broke the spell or if the alcohol was wearing off, but suddenly Santana felt very aware of what was happening. She still felt disappointed in herself that she could never be the daughter her parents already had, but it was nice for once in her life to have someone love her so. She wondered at times how Brittany could stand being with her, but whatever reason it was she was forever grateful. "Thank you so much. For everything."

"Let's go inside and get you cleaned up okay?" Brittany asked as she grinned at Santana's genuine appreciation. It was rare of Santana to have ever really thanked her without rolling her eyes or saying it in a sarcastic tone. However, it was even rarer for Santana to have opened herself so much. Brittany wasn't too sure what had happened, but whatever it was, she was sure she would never forget what happened today. Not only that, but she'd make sure that she would always love Santana because the girl needed her just like she needed Santana.

"Me too…." Santana mumbled, trying to let the other girl know that the feeling was reciprocal. She'd always be there for Brittany just as the other girl proclaimed. As the two stood up, Santana suddenly felt a weakness shoot through her. Today had been exhausting, both mentally and physically. She knew she had to get cleaned up, but she was so tired. Everything was shutting down and for some reason Santana didn't even want to try anymore. She just wanted today to end.

"It's okay, San. I got you." And so Santana believed her. She closed her eyes and let Brittany take care of her.

* * *

The next morning, Santana found herself waking up to the worst headache she ever felt in her entire life. It was as though her entire head was splitting open. The sunlight seeping underneath the blinds were exceptionally bright and Santana felt a sensory overload. Things slowly replayed in her mind as she remembered the disappointment from family night and her stupidly drinking her father's alcohol. She wondered how she got into her bed and if she even cleaned up the mess she made because from drinking that first glass until now, she could hardly remember anything. It was then she noticed a pile of blonde hair near her body, and screamed.

"AHHH! Santana, it's just me!" the scream had woken the blue-eyed girl and in her sleepy state she did her best to reassure her friend.

"Brittany, what are you doing here?" Santana asked wide-eyed that Brittany came to her house and more importantly in her bed with her.

"You... you told me to come remember?" Brittany's furrowed her eyebrows as she looked puzzled at Santana. Now Santana was the one with memory problems?

"What are you talking about, did you just come over or something?"

"Last night…. You… don't remember what happened?" It was surprising for Brittany to see Santana not remember. And when Santana doesn't confirm things, Brittany begins to wonder if perhaps she's the one remembering things wrong. She was pretty sure that last night had happened though. She remembered Santana calling her to come over, Santana barfing in the potted plant by the front door, Santana confessing all these things about her family, and Santana telling her that she'd always be her family. She was certain that it had happened, absolutely, positively certain.

"Uh, last night was family night Britt-Britt. Duh? I was playing… um… card games with my parents." At the moment, her headache intensified and she clutched her head in pain. "I guess they left and invited you over to keep me company. That's what happened, Britt."

"But…"

"Look could we just stop talking about this?"

Brittany's blue eyes could only further convey her puzzlement. She didn't remember Santana's parents calling her over to hang with Santana, but it could have happened. It was then that Brittany noticed the desperation in her friend's eyes again. It was almost begging for her to just confirm the situation so they wouldn't have to deal with it. She had seen that expression countless times before, but usually in a more commanding way. And if Santana didn't want to deal with reality, then there was nothing Brittany could do.

"You're right." Brittany sighed, dejected that her memory seemed to have failed her again.

"Of course, I am, ugh I have this huge headache, and I guess I was using my brain too much yesterday when we were playing games. Can you get me some water, Britt?" The sudden change in Brittany's demeanor was as obvious to Santana as a sunny day that suddenly began to rain. The blonde was never that good at hiding her emotions anyway and it bothered her that Brittany would be getting upset over something so silly. Why was the other girl even trying to convince her that something happened otherwise anyway? "And then we can watch some movie together."

"Sure, San," But before Brittany made her way to leave Santana's room, she paused to take one good look at Santana. The other girl felt uncomfortable under her friend's gaze but did her best not to seem intimidated. "I'm always here for you, kay?" And as soon as the words left, Brittany ran not wanting to her what the girl may say.

"I know… I remember."


	2. Friendless

**Author's Note: Sorry for taking so long on this update, I just had a lot of random errands to finish up. Since this is the beginning of their freshmen year, I haven't really put in the other members of the Glee club (I did put some though oops spoiler alert?). Thank you all for taking the time to read this chapter and I made it extra long since it took me so long to write it. I don't encourage drinking at all, but if any of you decide to please be wise about it! I don't own Glee at all! Let me know if you see any grammatical, factual, etc. errors! I'll correct them as soon as possible.**

It wouldn't be until another year later when they were at the susceptible age of fourteen that Brittany would get reacquainted with an extremely intoxicated Santana. Their first week of high school was both exciting and nerve-racking, but Santana made damn well sure that they'd sorted into the cool kids category. That wasn't that hard though considering that they were already two of the coolest girls in middle school, of course it would be such a smooth transition for them to enter high school with the same intimidation and popularity status as they had in middle school. The only problem was impressing the upperclassmen. Luckily for both girls, puberty came knocking on their door over the summer, and they both found themselves with decent-sized breasts for fourteen year old girls. Combined with their naturally attractive visages, slim physiques, and fashionable clothes they found themselves easily invited into the school's first house party – cool kids only. It would be at this very party that Santana does her best to impress her peers only to misjudge her own limitations. It would also be the first time Brittany is introduced to alcohol and finds out what kind of drunk she is.

"How do I look?" Santana asks as she turns around to face Brittany. She's wearing a tight black sheath dress, the kind that hugs all the right places and emphasizes the right assets. Her breasts have grown, but they're still small and she thanks God that she decided to go with this one instead of the strapless one. The top is sheer with an illusion neckline allowing her beautiful collarbone to be seen. It's an elegant dress considering the party she's going to is for her fellow peers instead of her father's co-workers and yet she feels a greater need to make an impression. She's wearing some new black pumps to go with the dress, which gives her extra an two-and-a-half inches. If she were to stand right by Brittany, maybe they'd be the same height. Her hair is down and curled, and it cascades elegantly over one shoulder. She has on some silver hoop earrings, not the ones with the diamonds that her parents gave her a while back, but the simple ones that still shine brightly in the light.

"Hot." It's all Brittany can say really because she's a little bit speechless. Her friend has always been one of the most beautiful people she's ever met, but like this… she's breathtaking.

"Yeah? On a scale from that animal sweater wearing Rachel Berry to Megan Fox, what would I be?" Santana turns around to continue glancing at her reflection in the mirroring as though fearing of any possible imperfections, not that that was really possible. Brittany only wishes Santana could see herself as she does because Megan Fox can't possibly hold a candle to Santana.

"You'd be like a five-thousand, seven-hundred, and seventy-eight, San," she says twirling her hair. The question dangles on her tongue though, "You think Megan Fox is that hot?"

"Random number much Britt? And yeah, she's been in every dude's locker ever since those Transformer movies and I got to admit, she's smoking," Santana comments while applying just a smidge more red lipstick.

"She smokes?" Brittany asks curiously.

"Probably, but I meant that she's so hot she burns everyone who touches her and hence the smoke," Santana explains as she turns around to apply the same red lipstick onto Brittany's lips.

"Oh, I get it!" Brittany says quickly before pursing her lips so her best friend can evenly apply the lipstick. Once done, Santana glances at Brittany's face to make sure the makeup is just perfect allowing Brittany to speak again. "And the number was how many Kelvin the sun is, which is super hot. I'm pretty sure you'd be even more smoking if you were the sun."

"Aww, thanks Britt. You look hot too," Santana genuinely smiles and Brittany knows that she means it.

"We always look hot."

"Not gonna argue with you there," Santana laughs before going to her bathroom again to spray some perfume.

"So whose party is this again?" Brittany says just loud enough so that Santana can hear her over the fan in the bathroom.

"Not too sure, but John told Katie told Lindsey told Jack told me that it's definitely one of the best parties of the quarter. If we can prove ourselves here, we'll be one of the cool kids for sure."

"Wait I thought we were hot, why do we want to be cool?" Santana imagines Brittany scrunching up her nose as she asks the question. It's been so long that they've been friends that she can imagine almost every expression Brittany has when she speaks – not that that's a bad thing. She always finds Brittany very endearing, especially the little faces she makes when she's confused.

"Like popular Brittany," Santana explains as she comes out smelling like Marc Jacob's Daisy. She holds out a silver charm bracelet to Brittany and then extends her right wrist so that Brittany may fasten the jewelry.

"Oh, I knew that, sorry I was still thinking about temperature," topics with similar words can confuse Brittany, but Santana is always patient enough to explain. As Brittany finishes clasping the hook, she admires as the beautiful silver sits exquisitely on Santana's small wrist. "We gonna drink there?"

"Yup, and I know it's your first time drinking, but just enjoy yourself. Just drink enough until you feel a buzz and then stop, you don't want to get too drunk and become a mess," Santana states as she pulls another charm bracelet from the nightstand and fastens it around Brittany's left wrist. They're matching friendship bracelets, something the two of them got for each other before high school started.

"How will I know when I'm buzzed?" Brittany wonders, not even sure if Santana knows the answer because it's not like the two of them really have drank. There was that exception a year ago when Santana went through her parent's stash though.

"Um, you'll just know. It's one of those things, when you feel it you'll know."

"Okay," she accepts the answer because what more can she ask. If Santana says you'll know it when you feel it then she must be right. However, she still fears about finding out what kind of drunk she is herself. Does buzzed mean drunk? Will she end up crying like Santana or barf and possibly embarrass them both? Concerned about the possibilities, Brittany decides to pipe up a suggestion. "Can we have a code word just in case something happens?"

"What would happen?" Santana asks not because she doubts Brittany, but because she doesn't want to think anything could possibly go wrong.

"I don't know, but just in case like what if a creeper dances with me?" Brittany plays with the small heart dangling from the chain. Her thumb attempts to feel the engraving of her own initials – _B.P._ It feels a bit foreign to her, which is strange because their her initials, but she's spent so much of her time wearing the same charm bracelet with another set of initials – _S.L._ That's how their friendship bracelets worked; they wore each other's initials as a way of stating they were each other's best friend. However, Santana had the last minute decision that wearing that may seem a little… gay, so they switched it so each girl would wear her own initials.

"There won't be any creepers Britt-Britt, this is a selective party," Santana reassures as she gets back up to go to the mirror to check her appearance.

"I know but just in case? Please like for emergencies?" She pleads because what if something does happen like she gets lost, or some boy tricks her into doing something she shouldn't be doing, or…

"Well, I guess just in case some guy tries to make you do something you don't want to do. What should our word be?" Santana asks.

"How about…I love to dance," Brittany suggests excitedly.

"Brittany, the point is to have a word you normally wouldn't use. You do love to dance and besides, that's a phrase it's too long."

"Oh yeah, sorry that was d-" she's about to say, but is immediately cut off by Santana's angrily walking towards her.

"Nope! Don't even say what I think you're going to say. It was fine, just for the wrong occasion. How about we use the word…" Santana grasps Brittany's hands so tightly that Brittany thinks her fingers are going to turn purple.

"Oh I know! Banana!"

"Banana?" Her hands loosen up in the confusion of Brittany's strange choice.

"Yeah because banana kinda sounds like Santana, so when I say it, it might catch your attention!"

"Santana Banana…" Santana slowly says feeling absolutely ridiculous as the words roll off her tongue. It sounds like something from a horrible Dora the Explorer episode.

"It's cute," Brittany takes this opportunity to poke Santana's dimples.

"Fine, but what about you," had it been any other person Santana would not even allow such a suggestion, but this is Brittany. She's always an exception.

"Umm… how bout kidney?" Brittany says in the same enthusiastic tone as she did before.

"Kidney? Well I guess no one's really going to be saying that during a party?" Santana secretly hopes she wouldn't have to go around the party saying kidney. What would they think she was doing? Though in reality she prefers not having to say either, there will be no issues.

"Right, isn't it awesome!" Brittany proudly smiles at Santana before hearing Santana's phone vibrate near her. With Santana still getting ready, Brittany is second in command to Santana's phone in case someone tries to reach her.

"Is that my phone Britt? Can you check if it's Jack? He's that senior kid that's giving us a ride."

"Jack Ass?" Brittany slowly says. She knows she hasn't heard all the surnames in the world, but the combination of Jack with the last name Ass just seems a bit… bad.

"Yeah."

"His last name is Ass?"

"No he just has a fine one, though now thinking about it, it makes him sound like he's a jackass. He's not."

"He says he's here," Brittany says after typing in Santana's password and opening up their chat session. As best friends, they both gave each other their passwords in case one needed to use the other's phone for some reason. Then again it wasn't that hard considering that Santana's password was just Brittany's birthday and Brittany's password was Santana's birthday. Hard to forget.

"Perfect, tell him to press 7894 and to drive to my house, it's the one on the first left then all the way down until you're at a corner. It has Lopez on the gates, he won't miss it."

"Okay," Brittany lies back down on her back and lifts her legs into the air as she types the message. It's embarrassing, but Santana can see her panties and she blushes for even looking in the first place. Brittany's wearing nothing more than a simple blouse with short shorts, but the shorts are slightly big on her and Santana can see the bright pink panties.

"And change him to Jack with the fine ass."

"Done!" Brittany goes to the contact list and changes the name and wonders just how fine of an ass Jack has. She secretly hopes he doesn't turn out to be an ass because that would be disappointing. Soon, Santana says she's ready to go and Brittany hops off the bed to link pinkies with her best friend. The two of them walk together down the stairs and make their way to find Jack.

"I can't believe your parents haven't been home for two days," Brittany comments as she passes down the family pictures by the staircase.

"Well you know how it is…" Santana says a bit too solemnly. After last year's incident, Santana has disclosed more information about how she feels about her family to her though. It makes her feel special like Santana really does trust her.

"Yeah and that's why I'm going to sleepover tonight!"

"Hells yeah, as long as Jacky boy does everything we ask and doesn't fuck up our night," Santana laughs before locking the front door and waving at the car, its beams of lights directed at them. She can faintly hear the music of Usher coming from his car and she rolls her eyes that of course he would be a fan of the person who has a song called "Get in My Car."

"Nice house," comes a very husky voice as the window of the car rolls down to reveal a handsome guy wearing a single plaid shirt.

"Nice car, Jackie, I thought the boy with the scar and the young Ronald McDonald crashed it when they flew into the tree," Santana jokes as she gets him. Brittany worries that he might not understand Santana's humor and misinterpret her words as insult, but as soon as she hears him laugh she relaxes.

"I bought it with my own money, and haven't you heard of vintage? This car's a classic." But Santana jut rolls her eyes.

"Hi, I don't think we've met, I'm Jack Russell," he says as he turns around and extends a hand to Brittany, who's already sitting in the backseat.

"Like the dog?"

"Just like it, but you can call me JR if you want."

"I'm Brittany Pierce," she reaches and grips his hand.

"And you already know my fabulous self," Santana states before getting into the car to sit by Brittany.

"Ha, yeah Satan Loco," Jack acknowledges.

"That's Santana too sexy Lopez and Brittany too hot for you Pierce to you Jacky," she says as she leans over and pinches his cheek. Brittany marvels at their interaction and in a way it seems they've known each other much longer than just a week of school.

"Is she always like this," Jack complains as he rubs at his sore cheek. By his grin, Brittany can tell that he knows Santana doesn't mean any animosity and actually likes his company. For some reason it makes Brittany a little jealous.

"Not always, but sometimes." Santana gasps at Brittany's comment and playfully slaps Brittany's arm.

"No I'm not! And hurry up or we're gonna be late!"

"You girls just going to sit in the back, what am I your chauffer?" he asks as he shifts the gear of his car to drive and speeds off.

"Basically, now let's go!"

"Your jokes slay me, Santana."

"So how do you guys know each other?" Brittany wonders and watches as Santana busily begins attending to her phone to text other people to see who's going to the party or update her status on Facebook.

"He's the TA in my history class," she says not looking up from her phone, the screen's illumination brightening her face so Brittany could remember how much work Santana put into her appearance. She was so beautiful even with the bluish glow.

"She kept staring at me in class, and when I was passing out the syllabus for the class on the first day, I dropped the stack of papers right in front of her and when I bent down to get it, she said…"

"Wanky," Santana chuckles. Brittany watches as Jack grins in the rearview mirror and she grows a little more envious of their friendship. How come she never heard about him until now?

"Thanks."

"What you have fine written all over your ass," Santana reassures.

"We talked a bit after class and both concluded we're both pretty cool kids."

"Yeah if you think being a huge history dork and reciting the amendments to the Constitution makes you cool," she lifts her head up to give Brittany that look – one that basically says he's-so-hot-but-such-a-nerd-I-don't-get-it.

"I think it's cool," Brittany admits. She was never that great at school-related stuff, so hearing someone who was so hot and so good at school was really cool. She didn't even know someone could be both. She thinks those smart kids were all mostly robots.

"Why thank you Brittany."

"So how do you guys know each other?" Jacks asks as he quickly glances at the two of them through the rearview mirror.

"Best friends since we first met in middle school," Brittany smiles at the memory of embracing a very reluctant young Santana.

"Yeah? Brittany seems so sweet though I don't know how she's able to handle a girl like you, Santana," Jack comments and surprisingly he's not the first to make that observation. But what people didn't ever really see was that Brittany could be sometimes equally as cruel and Santana just as sweet.

"Fuck you Jacky boy!"

"She's awesome. She's the best friend I've ever had," she moves her right hand over to link her pinky with Santana's left pinky. Hidden by the darkness of the car, Santana allows for the comforting gesture and even tightens the hold for a bit. Sometimes Brittany knows that it offends Santana that everyone thinks that she's a bad person.

* * *

The moment they arrive, Santana realizes just how many cars are parked outside of the host's house. She gulps in anticipation of her moment of breaking into the cool crowd. She's been waiting for this moment since school started and now here is her chance to prove to everyone her worth. As soon as they parked, Santana releases her pinky from Brittany, who seems a bit disappointed from the lack of touch. The house seems to shake from the music, the bass rumbling against the glass threatening to shatter and make its way out. The girls follow closely by Jack as he leads them inside and as soon the door opens, it shocks them to see how many people are already there. They see a plethora of people do a variety of things. Some people were making out on the staircase, others were dancing with a red cup in their hand, the contents undeniably something they weren't supposed to be drinking at their age, but who gives a fuck right?

"JR hey!" says a tall muscular blonde who gives Jack a high-five. He wears the McKinley varsity jacket and Santana immediately pegs him as a somebody worth getting to know.

"Looks like yet another awesome party Ryan," Jack says patting Ryan's back in admiration.

"And who are these ladies?" Ryan asks as he walks between them and puts his arm around both their waists. Santana takes the opportunity to lean into his embrace and notices just how muscular the guy was. It was kind of a turn on.

"Upcoming Cheerios, Santana Lopez and Brittany Pierce. Freshmen," Jack introduces, not really enjoying how Ryan's hands seem to go lower to nearly be able to cup the girls' bottoms.

"Fresh meat, eh?" Ryan smirks and in playing her role, Santana suggestively raises her eyebrow at him. He may be the host of the party, but he was an easy target to fall for her charms.

"Well you know the rules, JR, newcomers gotta shotgun a beer!" it wasn't what Santana thought he was going to say, but she wasn't going to mind getting a little drunk and experiencing what a high school party is like.

"San, we have to shoot a bear? What if I miss like Dick Cheney," Brittany asks a little thrown off by Ryan's accent and the loud music. "I don't want you to go to the hospital."

"I don't think that's what they mean, Britt. C'mon we'll just watch others do it and follow," she shouts into Brittany's ear hoping the girl can hear her. The music loudly pounds against her eardrum.

"You guys done this before?" Ryan asks as he takes them to his backyard and pulls out a couple of beers from the cooler.

"Oh please, I've drank so much alcohol it practically runs through my bloodstream," Santana says and Brittany immediately sees it as a lie. They've barely drank let alone get it to the extent of it running through her bloodstream like that. In fact, last time Santana was drunk was last year and that wasn't exactly the most fun experience she'd think.

"Confident miss aren't we, how bout loser has to take a shot of vodka. With no chaser," Jack suggests with a wink. Brittany hears these strange terms of vodka and chaser and wonders just what they mean.

"Bring it, Jacky boy."

"Santana, what are we supposed to do?" Brittany nervously holds her beer as she spins it between her hands.

"I'm not sure let's just watch these people go first," there's a group of boys and girls who seem to be doing this shotgunning business. She watches as they all raise their beers and drink from the bottom of the car as fast as they can.

"Ladies," Jack takes each of their beers and jams his key into the bottom rim of the beer. A hole is easily created and he hands it back to them. From what they observe, Santana deduces that they're going to have to put their mouths on the newly created hole and as soon as it begins, they open the beer from the top. The pressure, she guesses, will cause a surge of the carbonated drink to flood their mouths and cause them to drink it as fast as they can before it escapes and spills on them. She hopes that Brittany also picked up on these details because this was both their first time.

"All right, are you ready… GO!"

As soon as Brittany and Santana open the can, the surge of liquid surprises them more than they thought it would. The beer shoots into their mouth and both girls quickly swallow the drink to the best of their ability. The beer is bitter and Brittany wonders why people enjoy drinking it, soda is way tastier. Santana too isn't accustomed to the drink and almost pulls the drink away from her mouth before remembering that she's here to impress people. She closes her eyes and does her best to ignore the bitter taste in her mouth and the carbonation stinging her cheeks. Eventually she does finish, but not before having some of the beer escape from the sides of her mouth and dribbling down her chin. She looks to Brittany, who finishes just a little after her with a similar result. Brittany covers her mouth before releasing a loud burp. She then sees Jack, who's already done and just laughing at the sight. Ryan apparently finished long before and went to entertain more guests.

"Haha, looks like someone spilt on themselves, but don't worry I was joking bout the shot. I had a feeling you never did this before, it's okay," Jack says and hands them both a napkin so they can wipe their mouths.

"Here, try this instead, it's a lot better," Jack says handing them the infamous red cup that they've been seeing around in the party. The girls take it and look into the cup to see a very bright red liquid, it smells strangely like fruit punch. This looks and smells more familiar and so Brittany doesn't hesitate putting it to her lips and swallowing, eager to erase the bitter taste of beer from her mouth.

"I like this!" Brittany says excitedly to Santana.

"What is this?" Santana asks, a bit worried since she didn't see where Jack got the drink.

"Secret recipe from Ryan's older brother who's in some frat. Don't worry it's not drugged or anything, just very potent alcohol."

"You not drinking JR? Wimping out?" Santana taunts as she takes a sip of the jungle juice and has to agree with Brittany that it tastes much better. The drink's sweetness belies the strength of the alcohol intermingled with the juices.

"Nah I got to be the DD for tonight remember," he says as he twirls his keys round his index finger.

"You just shotgunned a beer with us," Santana accuses.

"That thing? That hardly does anything to me, now go have some fun, text me when you're ready to leave," Jack says patting on their back before leaving to go back into the house to do who knows what. Santana and Brittany look at each other and giggle about their first shotgunning experience. They take their red cups and follow the music back inside hoping to find a place to possibly dance in spite of how crowded the house is.

* * *

The main dance room seems to be the living room and Santana marvels at the giant stereo system blasting the music. The alcohol's effects also seem to slowly catching up to them as they begin to feel warm and allow their bodies to be lulled by the music. Dance was always Brittany's way of self-expression, so when Santana sees Brittany beginning to dance full-heartedly she can tell she's becoming less and less inhibited. Normally a bit shy about new crowds, Brittany seems to have forgotten where she is and begins seductively moving her hips to the beat of the track. Santana follows Brittany's lead and when she's close enough, Brittany places her free hand on Santana's hip as though claiming her. Brittany has also always been the better dancer and so when she gets low and suggestively moves from Santana's lower to upper body, Santana begins to feel a bit uncomfortable with their display of dancing. However, the alcohol already began to slightly work her magic and Santana soon could give less than a fuck of what people think. Besides to anyone else they may just seem like hot girls doing some hot dancing. Soon when Santana lifts the hand with her drink, it collides with Brittany's raising hand causing Santana's cup to spill a bit on Brittany's blouse.

"Shit! Britt, did I get it on you?" the sudden loss of her cup causes Santana to snap from her dance trance.

"It's okay, it's red and pretty," Brittany reassures as she continues to dance and tosses her hair back so that it would stop obstructing her view of Santana.

"I'm gonna go back and get some more."

"You want me to go with you?"

"Nah it's okay, just stay around here, I'll meet up with you," Santana disappears into the crowd and makes her way to the kitchen knowing that there was basically a container of the drink in almost every room.

"Okay," Brittany says to no one in particular. It's not long before she begins to miss Santana and she isn't even sure how much time has passed, but she thinks it's more than it should take for someone to get a drink. She remembers hearing at least three songs and begins to worry that Santana forgot about her. Looking into her cup, she throws the entire thing to the back of her throat and chugs the rest. It's not as difficult since this drink actually tastes good to her and she drops the cup somewhere on the floor, not really caring about the mess she creates. As she slightly falters, she makes her way to the kitchen in hopes of finding Santana and luckily she does. Her best friend is talking to these two guys, some weirdo with a mohawk and some other tall brunette in JV jackets.

"You didn't come back," Brittany slightly slurs as she stands by Santana and throws and arm around Santana's shoulders.

"Sorry, I got blocked by these stupid idiots, who wouldn't let me leave until…,"

"Tequila shots!" The boy with the mohawk chants out as he high fives the guy next to him. He eyes Santana a little too much for Brittany's liking and so she decides to take up the challenge hoping it'll make them leave them alone.

"Let's do it San," Brittany says as she grabs the bottom of Patron from mohawk-boy's hand and messily pours it into tiny little Dixie cups placed neatly on the counter. She spills some of the counter for the first two cups and fills only a little more than half for the other two, which she plans on for them to have because who knows what they're drinking or what they're doing.

"You sure?" Santana inquires as she accepts the small paper cup from Brittany.

"Yeah, why not," Brittany almost takes a swig of the drink before mohawk-boy stops her.

"Whoa Blondie, that's not a Tequila shot, Finn get the salt and lime!" the taller brunette by the name of Finn soon returns and the mohawk-boy, who turns out to go by the name of Puck, teaches them the "proper" way of drinking it. The girls lick at the skin on their hand between the index and thumb in that small crevice and pour a bit of salt on it. They're then given a lime to hold in the other hand and are instructed to lick, drink, and suck. They commence a cheers before all four of them do a Tequila shot… then another… then another. The alcohol begins to hit Brittany even harder and she reaches behind to stabilize herself as the noise of the stereo. It's some Nicki Minaj song and it's like the music is possessing her body because she starts to dance without being aware of it.

"How are you feeling," Santana asks noticing her friend's behavior.

"Happy, I feel really warm San. Is this the buzz?" Brittany asks as she lifts her heavy head to look at a somewhat confusing image of Santana. Her limbs feel heavy, but they're still moving.

"Yeah that's it, you'll be fine," Santana whispers to her and lovingly moves some loose strands behind Brittany's ear.

"How are you?" Brittany asks Santana, she has a hard time focusing on Santana's brown eyes… those beautifully dark brown eyes. She always thought brown wouldn't be a very pretty color for an eye color, but Santana's are the exception. They're brown, but just… so… damn…

"Fine," Santana says.

"Yeah, exactly."

"Huh?"

"You're not buzzed?" Brittany wonders and somehow she really wants to dance. She needs to dance, except that it's so hot.

"No, hey Bryan! Your alcohol is shit, I don't feel a single thing," Santana shouts out to that random guy they met in the beginning, that guy this party has to thank for.

"The name's Ryan, and here come with me then Lopez, I have a secret stash of the really good stuff," he grabs Santana somewhat forcefully. Santana, in turn, grabs Brittany because she wants her to go with her, but Brittany has other plans.

"Let's go, Britty,"

"But I wanna go dance," Brittany whines as Santana's grip tightens on her bicep.

"After we get more alcohol," Santana explains.

"No! Dance timeeee," the e draws out and Brittany does a spin to get out of Santana's hold. She grabs the sides of the door frame to allow herself to indulge in this strange feeling taking over her body. She kind of likes it, how warm and happy and how much she doesn't care about what happens if she decides to dance in front of her.

"I'll be right back – " Santana promises, but Brittany's already out of the kitchen and back somewhere in the living room. She begins to feel the buzz hard and becomes hypersensitive to the alcohol that had gotten her shirt wet. That combined with the heat she feels from either the alcohol or the many other bodies in the living room prompts her to take off her top to the delight of many of the boys and disdain of the girls. She tosses it to the floor and begins to dance, unsure of with whom. She has a drink on her hand, some random cup that she found on the table, and happily dances with the boy, girl, or whomever in front of her while occasionally sipping the beverage. Her eyes are closed and she just lets this feeling take control. Seeing everyone will just make her dizzy. How long has she been dancing? The alcohol blurs her sense of reality and time. She follows the beat of the music before finally opening her eyes when she hears someone cry her name out.

"Kidney! Kidney! Kidney!" it was their codeword!

"Banana?" Brittany stops her movements and suddenly everything becomes a lot clearer. She gives an apologetic look to the boy she's dancing with to find the source of her codeword. Strange how a sense of distress snaps you out of a drunken state.

It's Santana, who's leaning against the banister of the staircase, slowly making her way down. She's crying. Immediately, it snaps Brittany out of her buzz and all that matters is seeing what's wrong with Santana. She meets Santana halfway when she sees her crying. Brittany's worried about what happened but Santana has trouble standing up. Santana clings to her in a way Brittany is unfamiliar with and she looks around to see if there are any clues. Santana's breath reeks of alcohol.

"What's wrong?"

"I…I couldn't… I…"

"San, it's okay, I'm here now,"

"What the fuck?" Ryan comes out of the room buttoning his pants and it enrages Brittany to know the possibility of what could've happened. Did they…

"You! What did you do to her!" Brittany angrily stares at him accusingly and if she didn't have to stabilize Santana, she would have hit him.

"Nothing! We were just drinking and then we started making out and suddenly she started crying saying kidney. What the fuck is wrong with her kidney?" he shouts and she could smell the alcohol on his breath as well. The two of them are clearly very intoxicated.

"You kissed her?!"

"Yeah, because she wanted to!"

"Why did you do that, she's drunk? And why were you buttoning your pants!" Brittany is furious and this is exactly the reason she set up those codewords in the first place. She wasn't hoping they'd actually have to use them, but now that she knows that Santana has been violated…. She… she hates herself for not having gone with Santana and protecting her.

"Why does it matter to you anyway, what is she your girlfriend or something?" Ryan sneers and never did Brittany realize that such a word could seem so dirty, so negative. He probably didn't even mean it, but Santana seems to have a similar belief because she somehow stands up in Brittany's arms and walks towards him. Her finger jabbing into his chest with each word.

"Fuck you! She's not my girlfriend, Slobbermouth Mcsmall Dick. Don't you dare yell at her!" something he said must've offended her greatly and Brittany wonders if it's because he insinuated that they were lesbians or that he yelled at her. This was the first time the first happened, but the latter has frequently happened when people say she is dumb.

"Calm your small ass tits, dear God," Ryan covers his ears. Their speech gets drowned in the music and with all the yelling, Brittany wonders if anyone can hear their conversation. Then again no one seems to be paying attention because they all seem to be concentrating on something else.

"Hey what's going on?" It was Jack.

"JR!" Brittany cries in relief of the familiar face.

"Hey Brittany. Is Santana okay?" He sees Santana slamming her fists into Ryan's chest before slumping to the side and falling to the ground. Brittany immediately goes to catch her friend and rubs Santana's back as the girl cries in frustration over the entire situation muttering about finding something.

"JR, you know these sluts," Ryan stumbles over to his friend already forgetting the fact he met them earlier. Then again he problem doesn't remember more than half the people in his house.

"Yeah they're my friends, what'd you do Ryan," Jack asks sternly holding Ryan at arm's distance.

"Why the fuck does everyone think I did something. We were just making out and she freaked," he explains.

"I got it from here dude," Jack states and for some reason that seems to work in Ryan's book. Drunkenly, he walks past the group and makes his way downstairs as though to find another girl to drink with. He awkwardly puts his arms around the first girl he sees, but because of his popularity the girl smiles welcomingly instead of pushing him away.

"Sorry about that," Jack leans down to help Brittany pick Santana back up. True to his word, Jack hasn't drank since that first beer. Brittany becomes extremely grateful that Jack wasn't an ass at all and seems to be a pretty genuine guy. "Don't worry he seems just as drunk. He won't do anything or even remember anything."

"Can we go home?" Brittany pleads and Jack nods in agreement. While the party was still going on, Santana was definitely in no condition to continue with this. The loud music is also beginning to cause ringing in her ears.

"Can Santana get down the stairs?"

"I got her," Brittany wishes at this moment that Santana wasn't wearing such a tight shirt otherwise she would've given her a piggy back.

"I can carry her if you want."

"No! Britty!" Santana slurs out.

"It's okay JR, I got her. I'll be fine, I know I don't look it, but I'm pretty strong," she winks at him. Santana stands and wraps her arms around Brittany so the two can slowly make their way down the stairs.

"All right, but I'll just be a couple steps before you," Jack says moving just as slowly in case they slip.

"Thanks JR."

They get Santana into the car after a bit of resistance. The girls sit in the backseat and this time Jack makes no smartass remark, but rather respects their privacy. Santana lays her head quietly on Brittany's shoulder, her pinky seeking out her best friend's for that feeling of comfort again. As Jack begins his drive, it dawns on Brittany that it might be a better idea if they go to her house. She knows where all the headache medicines are for home.

"Actually JR, can you take us to my place, it's closer."

"No problem, just let me know where it is."

* * *

In many ways, Brittany's house is very different from Santana's. She lives in a one story house that is painted a soft yellow on the outside. The house seems to clash with all the other ones that around it, she lives in one of those neighborhoods where most of the houses look the same. It's strange, but yet seems to match the Pierce family. They were all warm hearted individuals with a spark of quirkiness. The Pierces always encourage their children to live out their imagination and to pursue the things that made them happy. Home would always be there to support them and so they painted it yellow like the sun. They would always watch them from afar and give them the necessary warm, support, and nutrients for their children to become wonderful people. Santana often supposes that's why Brittany is so kind because she was raised on kindness and love. Santana's house, on the other hand, while extremely beautiful and large is mostly empty and cold on the inside. The gates around it seemed to repel people and it appears unwelcoming. That was never the case of Brittany's house though, Santana always feels welcomed there.

Before arriving, Brittany decides to send a courteous text to her parents explaining minimally what happened. Their text back seems to show no judgment and only say that they are glad Brittany is so responsible. They've left waters and medication on the table near the couch. When they do arrive, Jack helps Brittany bring Santana to the front door, he doesn't want to enter their house since he doesn't really know Brittany. Once Brittany manages to lead Santana to the couch, she goes out to give Jack a huge hug for being so kind. He shakes his head and says that he's just doing what a guy should normally do for ladies. She tells him that she'll text him the following morning regarding Santana's condition and he thanks her. They wave goodbye to each other, and Brittany returns to the couch to find Santana crying again.

"Brittany! I'm so glad you're here," Santana opens her arms to indicate her desire for a hug and Brittany gladly fulfills her wish. The embrace lingers a bit longer than Brittany normally hugs Santana, but she happily stays in her best friend's arms. She suddenly realizes that she is indeed still just in a bra and she becomes even more appreciative that Jack never leered or attempted to do anything lewd.

"Of course I'm here," Brittany whispers into Santana's hair and rubs Santana's back in circles.

"I couldn't… I couldn't find you. I was so scared," Santana's nails dig into Brittany's back as though almost to confirm her presence and to ensure that she wouldn't leave her.

"It's okay," she gives one last squeeze before putting some distance between them so she can see Santana better.

"No! No it's not because you weren't with me and you were gone. And this guy was there and he told me that I was really pretty and started kissing me, and I just wanted to find you."

"I was just downstairs, but I'm sorry I wasn't there to prevent that," Brittany frowns at the thought it was her fault Santana was violated.

"I COULDN'T FIND YOU!" Santana drunkenly yells as tears stream down her face.

"It's okay," Brittany reassures because they were together now.

"I was so scared! I thought… I thought something might have happened and I wasn't there to protect you or be with you and…"

"San…" it was strange because Brittany was the one who felt guilty about the entire situation. Why was Santana worrying about her?

"You're the only person I care about in this stupid, miserable, stinking world. You are the light in this fucking dark world and when I don't know where you are, I get scared. I get so scared Brittany,"

"I'm fine," she leans forward to hug Santana again, letting the physical intimacy of the embrace soothe Santana that she is indeed fine.

"I know… I know, but… but… you're not going to stay with me forever… you can't."

"Why can't I? I told you before I'd always be there for you and always be your family."

"We're in high school Brittany, you're going to make other friends who are prettier, smarter, nicer, cooler than me… and realize what a shitty friend… no, shitty person I am. You're going to leave and I can't… I can't stand the thought of losing you," Santana's voice gets smaller with each confession. Brittany is taken back by the information because Santana is always so set on joining the cool kids and making as many friends as possible, Brittany swears she should be the one worried about this. Santana is all those things described and much more, Brittany always secretly worries that she'll just forget about her and leave her to be with the popular kids or that she'll be a burden on Santana. Thus to hear this, that it is Santana who has this thought is utterly strange, but flattering. However, it's not the case she would ever forget Santana because she's the first person to believe in her. And besides, they're best friends.

"Santana, I'm not going anywhere, I'll always – " but she gets cut off.

"You're my best friend Brittany. I care for you so much and I know I don't always show it, but I feel like you're the only person to ever just get me, ya know? You're my only and best friend," Santana takes the moment to wipe a lone tear before giving Brittany a sad smile.

"I get that, I feel the same way," Brittany attempts, but Santana cuts her off again not istening.

"But I'm a bitch, Brittany. I'm a horrible bitch and… sometimes I don't even understand why you're friends with me," Santana shuts her eyes and a new fresh batch of tears emerge. She curls into a small ball and pushes herself away from Brittany.

"San…"

"No don't even try to tell me I'm not, I know I'm a bitch. And maybe that's why people are always so careful around me because I hurt them."

"You've never hurt me, San, and I like you even if you can be a bitch at times."

"I just don't get it… you're one of the nicest people ever and I'm just such a fucking bitch and if it wasn't for you I'd probably have no one in this world… no one…" It's as though Santana is unwilling to listen. Brittany figures it must be the alcohol taking control of her mind because this discussion of feelings is way more than sober Santana would usually allow. It reminds her of how lonely Santana felt before with her family.

"San, you're more than what you think you are. You can be kind too, and you're amazing, and smart, and gentle, and selfless. Remember all those times you've defended me, you're not just a bitch," Brittany leans forward to take Santana's hands and pull her out of her fetal position. She pulls Santana's hands so that Santana can lay her head in Brittany's lap while letting her fingers run through the dark, curled tresses. "Plus if you are, it's because all those other people suck."

"You think so?" Santana hums.

"Of course."

"But I don't want to get in your way when you should be doing the things you want in high school too. I was the one who told you which classes to take, to join Cheerios with me, to go to this stupid party!" It's so weird that Santana doubts herself and is so unsure of herself again. It frustrates Brittany because it's as though Santana isn't listening again and she's just going to control rambling, so Brittany finally decides to make sure Santana is listening.

"SANTANA!" Wide brown eyes look up into Brittany's blue ones and for a second it looks as though Santana is worried that she's made Brittany angry.

"I care about you a lot too, more than you probably even know. I like hanging out with you, and all these things have been fun because they've been with you. I like these classes because I get to sit by my best friend and write funny messages about the people in class. I like being in the Cheerios because I get to dance with my best friend. And this party, it was fun because I got to do so many new things with my best friend. I don't care what happens to us in high school as long as we're together," Brittany confesses with ease. If she could, she would tell Brittany everything that was ever on her mind. Her concerns about life, school, their friendship, their relationship… but Santana was always so quick to shut that part of herself out that Brittany figures that it wasn't something that should be said. But now, with Santana showing so much vulnerability, Brittany figures it's time to do some reassuring. She loves her best friend and she wants her to know. Santana twists her face so it presses into Brittany's naked stomach and begins to cry.

"And maybe I'll want to do some things differently, but I'll tell you. And maybe sometimes we'll disagree on things and not do things together, but that doesn't mean I'll ever leave you, or forget you, or not want to hang out with you five minutes later," Brittany tucks some strands behind Santana's ear and leans in so Santana is sure to hear this. "You are my favorite person. Ever."

"You're my favorite person too," Santana says in return and peeks from her hiding spot of Brittany's tummy. Brittany gazes into Santana's eyes and then briefly glances down to Santana's lips. She's not sure if maybe the alcohol in her own system is making her braver than normal, but she feels herself leaning slowly towards Santana's own lips. She notices that Santana too closes her eyes and in that moment Brittany realizes that this can completely change their relationship… but that it would be under the influence of alcohol. She would be no better than Ryan when he was with Santana in that room. She doesn't doubt that their line in their friendship has been slightly becoming more and more blurred, but was Santana ready to cross it? Brittany knows she herself definitely is, she's always cared for Santana. Thus, as Santana closes her eyes as though waiting for that kiss, Brittany pulls back. When Santana doesn't feel Brittany's lips, she opens her eyes to see a very contemplative Brittany.

She's not going to remember most of this anyway Brittany tells herself, and it's true with the amount Santana has drank…. Brittany's going to regret doing something without Santana being aware of it. But seeing Santana so upset makes her feel like Santana shares the same kind of feelings as she does and just chooses not to act on it. Santana has never been good for talking about her feelings anyway and after seeing how defensive she was when Ryan made the lesbian comment, and the whole switching bracelets thing, Brittany knows that talking about their relationship at this point of their lives wasn't going to be the right time.

"Britt?" Santana squeaks and Brittany smiles at how cute of a sound it is.

"Yeah?"

"I'm really tired."

"Let's go upstairs then and sleep in my bed?" She did promise a sleepover. And Brittany had to admit she was a bit sleepy as well. On the side table were two bottles of water left by her parents, Brittany grabs them and hands them to both so they can be hydrated and hope that the next morning they won't have huge headaches.

"Okay… you're so good to me," Santana says as she gets off of Brittany's stomach and blushes slightly noticing that her friend is basically in her underwear. Oh well, Brittany will just have to buy another top, which means another shopping trip with Santana.

"Because you deserve the best."

"I don't deserve you…" She ducks her head in embarrassment because honestly why is Brittany friends with the bitchiest girl in school.

"Yes, you do. And you have me, always. I promise," she reaches over to link pinkies with Santana.

"I like this…" she shyly admits.

"What?"

"This," she holds up their linked pinkies.

Brittany smiles before telling Santana that they should do it more often because she likes it too. Together they walk to Brittany's room and quickly change into some pajamas, brushing their teeth, before passing out beneath the giant comforter. The following morning though, Brittany is disappointed to find out that Santana truly doesn't remember anything after being on the stairs. And while she'd like to talk more about feelings, she knows it's not the right time. So she smiles and hands Santana some Tylenol for her headache and more water and together they drink away the physical and emotional pain from the day before. Hangovers suck.


End file.
